Latest posts by Olivia (see all)
- My Philosophy Presentation on Mental Illness as Disability - October 1, 2019
- I am constantly afraid. - September 28, 2019
- Message to my Past Life: Leave Me Alone - September 21, 2019
I’ve gotten a few questions (and concerns) recently about how and why I choose my article topics. No one has asked this specifically, but in addition to exploring how and why, I want to talk about why I talk so much about past relationships and gaslighting.
First of all, I sometimes choose what I write about based on what gets the highest number of hits. Some days will see a few hundred views, some a few thousand, and occasionally, very occasionally, much more or less than that. I don’t use this criterion because I’m trying to get views, though that’s a nice bonus. I want to write about things that people care about.
You all know going in what this website is going to be about. It’s primarily about mental health, though I increasingly want to broaden my subject matter, but that’s neither here nor there. So within that spectrum of topics, the stuff that’s going to be the most popular is probably the more elicit, shrouded, confusing, scary, gross stuff. I try to walk the line between this kind of thing and more benign subjects, but I don’t try too hard.
Usually if something is too elicit, shrouded, confusing, scary, or gross to be talked about publicly, the blog is here to do its job on the subject.
I’ve gotten some great feedback recently that’s made my heart soar. It particularly focused on the idea that though I don’t get a ton of comments, I have a lot of readers who follow because they wouldn’t ever talk about something so personal or possibly shameful, in public. I already knew this, based on the ratio of views to comments, but hearing it from real people has made a huge difference in my confidence about the topics I choose.
Admitting to a suicide attempt only a month after it happened was a huge and controversial choice for me. It’s gotten the highest number of views among all of my articles. A lot of people close to me said it wasn’t a good idea. I did it anyways because it was important to me that this website function as honestly as possible. Honesty is huge with me, and if you all don’t know the mindset of the author, we aren’t on the same page.
Not only that, but plenty of people try to kill themselves. Where do they go in the aftermath to feel not so alone? The point of this website is to be here for the darker google searches of people who can’t find a relatable, health oriented firsthand account anywhere else.
Here is a ranking of my most popular articles, based on the data I can access. These four stand out, numerically.
If we pay any attention to this list, it becomes clear what people want to hear from me. They want to hear darker revelations about unusual twists to common things, like special ed schools, experience with the rare sociopathy and Munchausen’s, parenting but of a mentally ill child. I’m going to write that article about the top 5 rap songs to make you feel more confident, but it’s not going to do as well as the previous list. I’m going to write a creative piece on modern love in mental hospitals, but it won’t be read much.
Now, I’m going to say the following as firmly as possible. I’ve recently gotten some feedback about my discussion of gaslighting, lying, and emotional abuse. This feedback was from someone I write about. It was not positive. I want to make clear that regardless of feedback, my family, friends and I feel it is appropriate to continue writing about whatever I choose. This topic in particular feels necessary, for it deals with safety in relationships among the most vulnerable. I won’t be adjusting anything. If you take issue with how you are represented on this blog, I would suggest looking inward. This isn’t just a problem with this person. A few people have taken issue with their portrayals. I’m sorry to have gone through what I’m writing about, and not sorry for having written about it.
I would say leave some comments down below about topics you wanna see, but I get way more DM’s than comments so feel free to message me on Facebook, Instagram, or any of my personal social accounts, including email!